To Protect And To Love
by RkieFan
Summary: Officer Mike Danko kills an Intruder who attacks his wife, Jill, in their home. Can we work through this before he loses everything he's worked so hard for?
1. Default Chapter

DISCLAIMER: The characters are the property of Viacom and Spelling/Goldberg   
production and the writers. I am not making any money off of this. I just like   
to write about them.  
  
Summary: Mike Danko kills an intruder who attacks Jill. Can he get out of this   
mess before he loses everything he's worked for?  
  
Setting: Early first season, shortly after the pilot.  
  
TO PROTECT AND TO LOVE  
  
It was a hot summer day. Mike and Jill Danko had only been back together a few   
months. She was still getting used to the idea of Mike being a cop. But, the   
one thing it didn't take her long to remember was how much she loved him and how   
very much she needed him. She was soon going to find out what lengths Mike would go to in order to protect her.  
  
They were curled up on the sofa watching TV, alone for once. The usually ever   
present Terry Webster and Willie Gillis were working. Jill had her head on   
Mike's shoulder as he was working on a crossword puzzle. It hadn't been often   
lately that they had been able to spend an evening at home, alone.  
  
"Jill, I forgot to tell you. An Army buddy of mine called me this morning.   
He's going to try to drop by tomorrow. He's on his way back to Vietnam in a   
couple of days. If I'm not home, just let him in and I'll get home as soon as I   
can."  
  
"Does this friend have a name?"  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry. Ernie, Ernie Wilson. He said he isn't definite he'll drop by,   
but he was going to try. I should be home by five or so."  
  
There were times when Jill was still unspeakably frightened. Waiting for Mike   
to come home from work was always among the most frightening times for her.   
Just in the past few months, so many things had happened. First, Jared Whitman,   
a friend of Mike's from the academy had been killed in the line of duty. Then,   
a few months ago, Willie Gillis had been shot in the back during a robbery at a   
ball park and had almost died. His young girlfriend had been unable to deal   
with the possibilities of life with a cop and had gone back home to Ohio. Mike   
had asked Jill if it ever crossed her mind to leave. She told him sometimes.   
The only thing that stopped her was the thought that being alone in Alabama was   
far scarier than living the life of a cop's wife with Mike.  
  
Jill had gone to the store to pick up some things for dinner. When she went   
upstairs, she wasn't aware that she was being watched.  
  
The young man was hiding in some shrubbery when Jill drove up. By watching her,   
he could tell that she was home by herself. She was young, dressed in white   
like she was a nurse or something and what was best of all, she was pretty. He   
liked the pretty ones best of all. He tried to think of what line he was going   
to use to get into her apartment. He didn't like breaking in. The last time he   
had broken into an apartment, the girl who lived panicked and he had had to hurt   
her. He hadn't meant to hurt her. He just liked being with them because they   
were so pretty and most of them smelled so good. He decided to just go upstairs  
and ring her door bell. He would think of something to say when he got up   
there.  
  
Jill was chopping vegetables for dinner when the door bell rang. She looked at   
her watch. It was almost quarter after five. Mike should be home any minute.   
Jill went to the front door and looked through the peep hole. There was a young   
man standing there. He was dressed in paint spattered jeans and a white  
tee shirt. His blonde hair was shaggy and unkempt looking and he had what   
appeared to be a couple of days' worth of stubble on his face. To Jill, he   
didn't look like he was in the Army, but who knows? Jill put the door on the   
chain and opened it. He looked at Jill with clouded blue eyes. To Jill, he   
looked like he was stoned. She began to feel uneasy.  
  
"Hi, are you Ernie?"  
  
The guy tried to think. This was perfect if she was expecting someone she   
didn't know.  
  
"Yeah, I'm Ernie. Is it all right if I come in?"  
  
"I'll tell you what. Why don't you come back in about fifteen minutes. Mike   
should be home by then. He told me yesterday that he was expecting you."  
  
"I really don't want to wait. If he's going to be home soon, why don't I just   
come in and we'll wait for him together."  
  
Jill's heart began to pound. She didn't know why this guy was scaring her so   
badly, but for whatever reason, she decided to act on her instincts and tried to   
close the door. The guy was thin, but he was wiry and very strong. He shoved   
the door open, breaking the chain. Jill tried to run out the other door, but he   
was faster and he grabbed her. He clamped his hand over her mouth before she   
had a chance to scream. He had one hand over her mouth and clasped his other   
arm around her waist and picked her up and started carrying her toward the back   
of the apartment. Jill was kicking and struggling the whole time. The man   
didn't like this. He didn't like it when they fought back. He threw Jill on   
the floor and began tearing at her clothes. Jill responded by kicking him   
squarely in the groin. This enraged him further. He began swinging wild   
punches at Jill. Some landed and some didn't. Jill didn't feel the pain, all   
she knew was she was in a fight for her life.  
  
"Mike! Mike, please help me!"  
  
"There ain't nobody going to help you, you bitch! This would have been so much   
easier if you hadn't fought me! I had to hurt the last one who fought me!"  
  
He put his hands on Jill's throat and was trying to strangle her. Jill put both   
of her hands on his and was trying to pull them off, the whole time hoarsely   
calling for Mike to help her. She didn't know where he was. He had always come   
in the nick of time in the past.  
  
Mike pulled up in the parking lot and was whistling as he walked up the stairs   
to the apartment. The whistling stopped when he got to the apartment door and   
saw it opened, the safety chain broken. The hair on the back of his neck began   
to stand up. Out of instinct, he reached down for her service revolver,   
remembering too late that he was off duty. His off duty weapon was locked up in   
the bedroom.  
  
"Jill!"  
  
Jill was almost unconscious when she heard probably the most welcome sound she   
had ever heard in her life, the sound of her name being called. Her voice was   
almost gone, but she managed to croak out a cry for help.  
  
"Mike, please help me!"  
  
Mike ran toward the bedroom and instantly saw red when he saw the grungy looking   
man with his hands on Jill's throat. Mike ran over and grabbed the guy by his   
shirt. Jill rolled away and tried to get her breath back when she felt the   
pressure release from her throat. She could hear the scuffle going on, but   
there was nothing she could do to help.  
  
Willie Gillis and Terry Webster got home about ten minutes after Mike. They   
could hear something from the bottom of the stairs, but they didn't know what   
they were hearing. It became a lot more clear as they walked up the stairs.   
There was a terrible fight going on and it was coming from Mike and Jill's   
apartment. Willie and Terry ran in and found Mike in the bedroom, with the guy   
pinned to the floor where Mike was beating the hell out of him. Jill was laying   
in one corner of the bedroom coughing and gagging.  
  
Terry was trying to pull Mike off of the guy, but Mike was angry and strong as   
an ox. He finally had to enlist Willie's help to get Mike off of the guy. The   
guy's face was a bloody mess from Mike's blows.  
  
"Mike, come on! Get off of him! It's me, Terry!"  
  
Mike stood for a second gasping for breath before he ran over to where Jill was   
still laying semi-conscious in a corner of their bedroom. Willie walked over to   
the phone.  
  
"I'll call an ambulance."  
  
Terry was checking the guy laying unconscious on the floor. He checked his   
pulse and then bent down to listen for a heartbeat. He then looked over at Mike   
with a sickening feeling in the pit of his stomach. Mike was sitting on the   
floor with Jill in his arms. She was crying and moaning and still coughing, but   
she appeared to be pretty out of it. Within what seemed like minutes, the   
apartment was filled with cops and ambulance attendants. Lt. Ryker showed up   
after all of them. Terry pulled him off to one side.  
  
"Webster, what happened?"  
  
"We don't know, sir. We heard noises from downstairs. When we got up here, we   
heard that the struggle was coming from in here. When Willie and I came back   
here, Mike was on top of the guy. We pulled him off of the guy. He's dead,   
Lieutenant."  
  
Ryker turned to the ambulance attendants and asked if Jill was going to be okay.  
  
"She's bruised and battered, but I think she'll be okay. We're going to   
transport her now."  
  
"I'm going with you."  
  
"Danko, let them take her. You can join her in a little while. We need to   
talk."  
  
"Sir..."  
  
"Now, Danko! The hospital will keep you posted. Gillis, you go to the   
hospital."  
  
"Yes, sir. I'll call you as soon as I know anything, Mike."  
  
"Danko, let's you, me and Webster go in the other room and let the detectives   
work."  
  
Ryker, Terry and Mike went into the other room. Mike glanced toward the door   
way as the ambulance attendants rolled out the gurney with Jill on it. Willie   
looked at Mike again as he followed them out the door. It was hard for Mike to   
concentrate on Ryker and Terry. His place was with the woman going out the   
door. His place had always been with her. He sat down on the sofa and looked   
down at his hands. His knuckles were split open and bleeding. He went into the   
kitchen and got some paper towels. He knew Jill would have a fit if he used her   
good dish towels to clean up blood. He sat down and pressed the paper towels to   
his knuckles.  
  
"Danko, what happened?"  
  
"When I came home, the front door was opened and the chain was broken. I heard   
Jill crying for help. When I went into the bedroom, he was on top of her with   
his hands on her throat, trying to strangle her. I grabbed him and we fought.   
That's all I remember until Willie and Terry pulled me off of him."  
  
"He's dead, Danko. You'd better start remembering everything."  
  
"He can't be dead. I only hit him a few times."  
  
"We'd better go down to the precinct. Homicide detectives are going to want to   
talk to you."  
  
"Sir, it was self defense."  
  
"Danko, I have no doubt that it was, but you can't take matters into your own   
hands. You learned that in the academy."  
  
"I need to be with Jill."  
  
"Jill isn't going anywhere, Danko. Come on, let's go."  
  
They examined Jill and told Willie that except for some pretty severe bruises,   
she wasn't seriously hurt. But, they did tell him that they would keep her   
heavily sedated until Mike was able to show up. Willie sat with her before he   
went to call Mike. She had some horrible bruises around her throat and on her   
face. Both eyes were black and blue and her lips were badly cut. She stirred   
and tried to open her eyes. She was confused. Had she overslept? She was so   
sore she couldn't move. She struggled to open her eyes. She could make out a   
shadow of a figure sitting beside her bed. It took her several seconds to   
focus. By the time she was able to focus, the figure was no longer by her bed.   
Instead, there was someone in white who stuck Jill in the arm with a needle.   
Everything soon faded to black.  
  
When Ryker, Terry and Mike got to the precinct, Ryker talked to Terry first.   
There were two detectives in the room with them.  
  
"Officer Webster, this is detective Granger and detective Little. Gentlemen,   
this is Officer Terry Webster."  
  
Det. Granger spoke first, "Have a seat, Officer Webster. We understand your   
partner is at the hospital with Mrs. Danko, so we'll talk to him later. Can you   
tell us what happened?"  
  
"I'll tell you what my partner and I saw, which wasn't much. We arrived home at   
about 25 after 5 and we both heard noises when we were at the bottom of the   
stairs."  
  
"What kind of noises?"  
  
"Scuffling noises, nothing specific."  
  
"Okay, what next?"  
  
"When we got upstairs, we walked past the Danko's apartment and noticed that the   
front door was ajar. The noises we heard downstairs were louder when we got to   
the Danko's. We entered the apartment and looked for the source of the noise.   
It was coming from the back of the apartment, from their bedroom. When we   
entered the bedroom, Officer Danko was on top of the suspect."  
  
"What was he doing?"  
  
"Fighting with him."  
  
"What happened next?"  
  
"My partner went to see about Mrs. Danko and I went to get Officer Danko off of   
the suspect. He started fighting me, so Officer Gillis came over to help me.   
Between the two of us, we were finally able to pull him off of the suspect."  
  
"Did Officer Danko say or do anything after you and Officer Gillis pulled him   
off of the suspect?"  
  
"No, sir. He went over to attend to his wife."  
  
"What did you and Officer Gillis do then?"  
  
"Officer Gillis went to call for an ambulance, while I checked on the suspect.   
I felt for a pulse and listened for a heartbeat, but there was nothing."  
  
"Okay, Officer Webster. Stick around in case we have more questions for you."  
  
"Sure, no problem. I wasn't exactly planning on leaving the country."  
  
"Lieutenant, go get Officer Danko."  
  
Mike walked into the room looking like he was about to be executed.  
  
"Should I call a lawyer?"  
  
"We're just investigating right now, Officer Danko. Please have a seat. I'm   
Detective Granger and this is my partner, Detective Little. You might want to   
go to the infirmary and get your hands doctored."  
  
"My hands are fine. Can we get on with this, so I can see about my wife. I   
don't like leaving her alone."  
  
"We need to know what happened."  
  
"When I got home, I noticed that my front door was standing opened and the chain   
was broken. I then heard Jill calling my name from the bedroom. When I went   
into the bedroom, this man was straddling her with one hand on her throat,   
trying to choke her. I grabbed him off of her and we began fighting. That's   
all I remember until Officers Webster and Gillis pulled me off of him. I only   
remember hitting him a few times. I don't see how I could possibly have killed   
him."  
  
"Well, you were pretty upset about what he had done to your wife. It's easy to   
lose control in the heat of passion."  
  
"What's going to happen now?"  
  
"That's going to depend on what the D.A. wants to do. We'll turn the results of   
our investigation over to the D.A.'s office and see what happens after that."  
  
"I could go to prison?"  
  
"I think you're jumping the gun a bit, but yeah, that is a possibility. They're   
going to perform an autopsy and get an exact cause of death. I'll tell you like   
I told Officer Webster. Don't take any sudden trips out of town."  
  
"I'm not going anywhere except to the hospital to see my wife."  
  
"Speaking of your wife, when can we talk to her?"  
  
"I don't know. I'll have to talk to the doctor and I'll let you know."  
  
"Okay, you can go, Officer Danko. For what it's worth, Officer Danko, I   
probably would have reacted in the same manner, but there can't be one law for   
criminals and another for cops. You can't go above the law."  
  
"Yes, sir. Is there anything else?"  
  
"No, you can go. If we need anything, we'll come to the hospital."  
  
When Mike got to the hospital, it was dark outside. He looked at his watch. It   
was almost 11 o'clock. He couldn't believe 6 hours had passed. He went and saw   
a doctor about his hands. They x-rayed them and told him nothing was broken,   
they were just badly bruised and cut. He got special permission to sit with   
Jill. He walked in and saw Willie sitting in a chair by her bed.  
  
"Mike, hi. Is everything okay?"  
  
"Yeah. How is she?"  
  
"They've been keeping her heavily sedated so she wouldn't notice you weren't   
here and start asking questions. The doc said she's going to be okay. They'll   
probably be releasing her in a few days."  
  
"Yeah, I know. I saw him when I got here. Look, there's two detectives that   
are looking for you. They just have routine questions for you."  
  
"Okay. Hey, you need to get some sleep."  
  
"I'll be okay. I need to be with Jill when she wakes up."  
  
"Then, I'll see you later, okay?"  
  
"Yeah."   
  
Mike took a seat in Willie's recently vacated chair and picked up Jill's ice   
cold hand. Her face was black and blue and horribly swollen, even worse than   
the first time he had seen her after Cleve had beat her up. He clasped her hand   
in both of his and brought them up to his lips.  
  
"Baby, I am so sorry. I wish I had gotten home sooner. I never would have put   
you through this again."  
  
Jill felt like she was in a thick fog. She thought she could hear Mike's voice,   
but she couldn't reach him. Her throat was parched like she had been walking   
through a desert. She wanted some water. She tried to open her eyes, but it   
felt like they were glued shut. She thought she could make out Mike sitting by   
her bed, holding her hand in his. She couldn't figure out why he was sitting   
beside the bed. Where was she and what had happened? Jill tried to think, but   
her mind was so fuzzy. She remembered a man coming to the apartment. She   
remembered a fight and...that was it. That was all she could remember. Mike   
noticed her stirring.  
  
"Jill? Baby? Can you hear me?"  
  
Jill finally forced her eyes open and tried to smile at the sound of Mike's   
voice. Her eyes were blood red from the guy attempting to strangle her. It had   
caused blood vessels to burst in her eyes. The doctor had told Mike it was   
awful looking, but they would monitor her eyesight and it would probably clear   
up in several weeks.  
  
"Hi."  
  
"Hi. You're going to be okay. I talked to the doctor and he says they're going   
to keep you here for a few days for observation."  
  
Jill's voice was hoarse as she tried to answer him, "I thought it was your   
friend. The one you told me was coming over."  
  
"I know."  
  
"But, he looked...I don't know, there was something about him. I put the door   
on the chain after I looked through the peep hole. I got scared. Is he in   
jail?"  
  
"We'll talk about him later. Right now, I want you to close your eyes and go   
back to sleep."  
  
"Mike, please don't leave me."  
  
"Shh, I'm not going anywhere. Sleep now."  
  
Jill fought to stay awake for a few minutes, finally succumbing to the effects   
of the sedative she had been given earlier. Mike fell asleep in the chair   
beside her bed. He was still asleep when he felt someone tap him on the   
shoulder. He opened his eyes to find Lt. Ryker standing beside him. Ryker   
motioned for him to step outside. Mike followed him out into the corridor.  
  
"How is your wife?"  
  
"Lucky to be alive. They're going to keep her for 2 or 3 days. She's going to   
be okay."  
  
"I'm glad to hear that. Danko, I've talked to the chief. Pending a formal   
investigation, you have been relieved of duty with pay. I need your shield."  
  
Mike took his shield out of his pocket and handed it to Ryker. Mike knew this   
was going to be the outcome. He knew police procedure, but it didn't make it   
any easier to deal with. But, he knew if he had to do it over again, he would   
do the same thing.  
  
"Mike, I'm sorry."  
  
"I am, but I'm not. Do you know what I mean?"  
  
"Yeah, I think so. I would probably have done the same thing you did if it had   
been my wife I saw being attacked. If she's up to it, the detectives want to   
talk to her in the morning, first thing."  
  
"Yes, sir. Can I be there when they talk to her?"  
  
"I don't see why not. I'll see you in the morning, Danko."  
  
Mike was asleep in the chair the next morning when Jill woke up. The first   
thing she saw was Mike's hands. He looked like he had been in a vicious fight.   
She struggled to sit up. Mike heard her moving and woke up.  
  
"Hey, lay still. What do you need?"  
  
"Water."  
  
Mike poured a cup of water and helped her drink some of it. "I talked to Ryker   
earlier this morning. There's some detectives that are going to be coming by to   
talk to you. Do you feel up to it?"  
  
"Yeah. Your hands? What happened to your hands?"  
  
"I cut them fighting the guy who attacked you."  
  
"Is he in jail?"  
  
"No."  
  
Tears began to fall down Jill's face. "Mike where is he?"  
  
"Baby, I want you to listen to me. When I came in and I saw that guy on top of   
you trying to strangle you, I guess something inside of me snapped. I pulled   
him off of you and we began fighting. The next thing I knew, Terry and Willie   
were dragging me off of him."  
  
"You killed him?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"God, Mike. I'm so glad. I thought he was going to kill me and I was never   
going to see you again. I'm glad he's dead!"  
  
"Shh, we don't have to talk about it anymore."  
  
"Mike, what's going to happen now? I mean, won't you be in trouble?"  
  
"Yeah, I might be, but it was worth it. I've been relieved of duty pending an   
investigation."  
  
"Mike, what's going to happen after that?"  
  
"I don't know. Depending on what the D.A. decides, I could face criminal   
charges."  
  
"What if I don't press charges?"  
  
"Baby, it isn't going to be up to you."  
  
Jill began to cry. "Mike, I don't want you going to jail because of what you   
did to save me. Don't they realize that's why you did what you did?"  
  
"Baby, they know, but it doesn't matter. I shouldn't have taken matters into my   
own hands."  
  
Now Jill was angry. "What should you have done, Mike? Stand by and let him   
kill me? Because, chances are, you would have been next!"  
  
"No, but I should have handled things differently than I did."  
  
There was a knock on the door. Mike went to answer it. Lt. Ryker was standing   
there with detectives Little and Granger. Ryker motioned for Mike to come   
outside.  
  
"Danko, let's step away from her door. Is Mrs. Danko up to answering   
questions?"  
  
"Yeah. It's hard for her to talk because her throat is swollen from the guy   
trying to strangle her. Let me go in and tell her that you're here."  
  
"Danko, I'm afraid that I can't let you do that."  
  
"What are you talking about you can't let me do that? Let me do what?"  
  
About that time, Terry and Willie showed up in uniform, looking uncomfortable.   
Mike looked at Ryker and then at them. This was his worst nightmare coming to   
life.  
  
"Danko, I got off the phone an hour ago with the D.A.'s office. I hate to do   
this, Danko, but we have to take you into custody for the murder of Reese   
Temple."  
  
"What am I being charged with?"  
  
"Second degree murder. Webster, you know the drill."  
  
"Sir..."  
  
"Webster, if you don't follow procedure and he walks..."  
  
Terry took off his hand cuffs and snapped them on Mike. "Mike, I'm sorry."  
  
"You're only doing your job, man."  
  
"You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used   
against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you   
cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed by you by a court of law. Do   
you understand these rights I've just read to you?"  
  
"Yeah, I understand them. Lieutenant, who is going to tell Jill?"  
  
"I'll tell her when I go in with the detectives. Danko, for what it's worth,   
you can post bond as soon as they book you and be back here in a few hours."  
  
"What happens next?"  
  
"You know the answer to that one. They present the case to the grand jury and   
let them decide if they want to proceed or not. Take him in."  
  
"Lieutenant, can I say something?"  
  
"Danko, you're wasting time. The sooner Webster and Gillis get you to Central,   
the sooner you can be back here with your wife."  
  
"Just one thing. Terry and Willie know this, but you don't know Jill that well.   
Jill is a very complicated person, with an equally complicated past. She's not   
going to take this news well. And, she may not take it at all from you."  
  
"Danko, I am doing you a favor by letting Gillis and Webster take you into   
custody. The chief didn't want to do that, but I fought him."  
  
"Look, I'm not saying I want to go in there myself and tell Jill what's going   
on, but can't you let one of these guys do it for me?"  
  
"No, Danko. I will tell her and she can either accept the news or she won't.   
I'm not telling you guys again to go. Now!"  
  
"Yes, sir. Come on, Mike."  
  
Ryker watched as Terry and Willie walked off with Mike between them. He looked   
over at the two detectives. "Gentlemen, let me go in and talk to Mrs. Danko   
first, then I'll let you go in and talk to her."  
  
Jill was laying in bed waiting for Mike to come back into the room. She was not   
expecting Lt. Ryker to walk in, instead. She sat straight up, instantly   
apprehensive. Something was wrong or Mike would have come back in.  
  
Lt. Ryker didn't like dealing with the wives of his officers. He always felt   
uncomfortable dealing with the tears and the emotions when he had to give them   
news about a husband being killed in the line of duty. Now, he had to tell this   
dark haired, dark eyed young woman that her husband had just been arrested and   
charged with the murder of the man who was trying to kill her. He didn't know   
Jill that well. He had seen her a few times and had spoken to her the same   
number of times, usually at the hospital dealing with business. He had never   
had to deal with her on a personal level before.  
  
"Where is Mike? What's going on?"  
  
"I need to talk to you for a few minutes, Mrs. Danko. Have you talked to Mike   
about what happened?"  
  
"Yeah. Mike told me he killed the guy."  
  
"Yes, that he did. But, what he did may have unforeseen consequences. See, the   
law works like this. After a crime, the detectives investigate. They then turn   
the results of their investigation over to the D.A.'s office, who in turn, also   
conduct an investigation of their own and decide whether charges should be   
filed. The D.A.'s office has decided in this case that Mike should be charged   
with second degree murder."  
  
"Where is Mike now?"  
  
"On his way to be booked. Mrs. Danko, I am sorry. If there was any other way   
around it, I would have fought it. The good news is, he can post bond as soon   
as he's booked and be back here in a couple, maybe 3 hours."  
  
"What will happen now?"  
  
"The D.A. will present the case before the grand jury and they'll decide if Mike   
should be indicted and brought to trial."  
  
"What if the grand jury decides that he doesn't? Can Mike still be a cop?"  
  
"It's called a 'no bill.' That means the grand jury doesn't return an   
indictment, in which case, pending the outcome of the police investigation, yes,   
more than likely Mike can still be a cop. You would want that? For him to   
still be a cop?"  
  
"Well, not exactly, but Mike told me once it's all he's ever wanted since he was   
a kid."  
  
"Are you all right?"  
  
"I don't know. Right now, I'm in shock."  
  
"The reason I'm asking is there are two detectives outside who need to talk to   
you about what happened. It can't wait until Mike gets back. We need to get   
this cleared up."  
  
"Okay, just so they understand that it's hard for me to talk above a whisper."  
  
"Okay, let me go get them."  
  
Terry and Willie led Mike into Central Booking. Terry removed the hand cuffs   
from Mike and finger printed him. They both felt sick over what they were   
having to do. The cop in booking handed Mike several paper towels.  
  
"Hey, Danko, for what it's worth, I probably would have killed the son of a   
bitch, too."  
  
"Yeah, well, if I had to do it again, I'd probably do the same thing, but who   
knows? I don't think I'd want to do the same thing again."  
  
The two detectives walked into the room to talk to Jill. To her relief, Ryker   
came back in with them. Jill figured if Mike couldn't be there, at least there   
would be someone in with her that she did know, even if she didn't know him   
well.  
  
"Mrs. Danko, I'm Det. Granger, this is my partner, Det. Little. We need to ask   
you a few questions. We'll try to make this as brief as possible. Do you know   
the man who attacked you?"  
  
"No, I had never seen him before."  
  
"How did he get into the apartment?"  
  
"Mike told me he was expecting an Army buddy, who might or might not come by. I   
had just gotten home when the door bell rang."  
  
"So, he rang the bell?"  
  
"Yeah. I got a bad feeling when I opened the door on the chain."  
  
"A bad feeling? What do you mean?"  
  
"The guy looked...I don't know, he didn't look like he had been in the Army. I   
got scared."  
  
"Okay. What happened then?"  
  
"I told him to come back in 15 or 20 minutes. I figured Mike would be home by   
then. He said he didn't see why he couldn't wait inside. When I tried to close   
the door, he shoved it opened. I tried to run out to the balcony to scream for   
help, but he grabbed me and dragged me toward the bedroom."  
  
"Did he say anything?"  
  
"No, not right away."  
  
"What happened after he dragged you to the bedroom?"  
  
"Hold on just a second. Lieutenant, could I get some water?"  
  
"Sure."  
  
"Thank you. I'm sorry, what was your question?"  
  
"What happened after he dragged you to the bedroom?"  
  
"He threw me on the floor between the bathroom and our bedroom and began tearing   
at my clothes. I started kicking at him and I guess I landed a couple, because   
he began punching me in the face. Then, he put his hands on my throat and began   
choking me."  
  
"When did your husband come into the room?"  
  
Jill shook her head. "I'm not sure. I remember calling his name for him to   
help me. The guy hit me again and told me nobody was going to help me. I guess   
Mike came in right after that, because all of a sudden, I could breathe again."  
  
"So, you didn't see your husband attacking Mr. Temple?"  
  
"I couldn't move. I could hear the fight, but I never saw it."  
  
"What about Officers Webster and Gillis? When did they come in?"  
  
"I don't know that, either. You have to understand. The guy had beaten me to   
within an inch of my life, then he tried to strangle me. If the president had   
walked in, I wouldn't have known it."  
  
"Okay, we're almost done. Just a couple of more questions. Has your husband   
ever been violent with you?"  
  
"No, never."  
  
"Have you ever seen him exhibit this kind of behavior in the past?"  
  
Jill thought to the day Mike had chased Cleve around her front yard in Alabama.   
He hadn't beaten Cleve up, but he had definitely put the fear of God into him.  
  
"He chased my ex-boyfriend around my yard once after we got engaged."  
  
"Chased him? What do you mean?"  
  
"Look, it wasn't anything. He thought I was being threatened."  
  
"He seems to think he's your knight in shining armor."  
  
Lt. Ryker decided Jill had had enough interviewing for one day.  
  
"Are you guys finished?"  
  
"Yeah, we're finished. Thank you, Mrs. Danko."  
  
Jill stopped Lt. Ryker as he got ready to follow them out the door.   
"Lieutenant?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Can you stay for a couple of minutes?"  
  
"Yeah, I can stay for a few minutes?"  
  
"I have to explain something. I can tell you because I don't think you would   
take out an ad."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"I met Mike when he was stationed in Alabama. I had just gotten out of an   
extremely abusive relationship. The incident I was referring to a while ago was   
just a misunderstanding. My ex had come by my house. I was in my yard taking   
care of my garden. Mike pulled up and thought I was being threatened by him. I   
wasn't, at least, not yet. Mike started chasing him around my yard. They were   
ruining my garden, so I turned the water hose on them."  
  
"You did what?"  
  
"I had a sprayer attachment on the hose and I turned it on them. My yard turned   
into a sea of mud. Have you ever been to the South?"  
  
"No."  
  
"The earth is red clay. So, you can imagine what my yard looked like."  
  
"Red clay mud."  
  
"Yeah. Lieutenant, I love Mike very much, but maybe that detective is right."  
  
"About what?"  
  
"Mike rescued me once a long time ago when I needed him. Maybe I do kind of   
think of him as some kind of a knight in shining armor."  
  
"Is that such a bad thing? You get some rest now."  
  
Mike got a ride back to the hospital. He went to the rest room to clean up   
before he went back into Jill's room. When he got to Jill's room, Ryker was   
just walking out.  
  
"Danko? See, I told you it wouldn't take long."  
  
"Is Jill okay?"  
  
"She's fine. I explained what happened and I think she took the news pretty   
well."  
  
"I'd better get in there. Has she talked...?"  
  
"They just left."  
  
Jill was lying in bed resting her eyes when Mike walked in. She was seeing   
spots in front of her eyes. The doctor said she would for a while until the   
blood vessels healed up. He went to find her a pair of sunglasses to shield her   
eyes from the harsh hospital lights. She gasped with surprise and happiness   
when Mike walked in. When he walked over, she threw her arms around his neck   
and held him as tight as she could.  
  
"Are you okay?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm okay. I'll tell you, though. Jail is not an experience I'd   
recommend for anybody."  
  
Jill began to cry as she continued to hold him. "Mike, I'm sorry. I tried to   
shove the door closed."  
  
"Baby, it wasn't your fault. He shouldn't have been there. I just wish I had   
gotten home a few minutes earlier. I just don't remember hitting him hard   
enough or often enough to seriously hurt him. I just thought I had knocked him   
out."  
  
"The doctor went to find me some sunglasses. I keep seeing spots in front of my   
eyes."  
  
"Will that clear up?"  
  
"Yeah, but he said it might take several weeks. I want to go home, Mike. I   
want to sleep in our bed with you beside me. I don't like it here."  
  
"I know. Look, they want to keep you at least one more night. You're safe   
here. I'll see if they'll let me stay."  
  
"You don't have to stay. I just don't like it here. Mike, what is going to   
happen if...if...  
  
"If they indict me? I'll go on trial. If they find me guilty, I could go to   
prison."  
  
"Are you sorry you did it?"  
  
"No, I'm not sorry I did it. I'd do it again. Look, we'll talk more about this   
later. Right now, I want you to rest."  
  
"Mike, I don't want anything to happen to you because of me."  
  
"Hey, it isn't your fault. I couldn't stand by and let him hurt you. I think   
any man would have done the same thing. Now, I want you to lay down and rest."  
  
Mike sat back and tried to think as he watched Jill sleep. He didn't think it   
would be possible for him to kill someone with his bare hands. He had never   
before experienced that kind of rage in his life. But, coming into the   
apartment and seeing the one person he cared more about than anything in this   
world being hurt had brought out feelings in him he didn't know he possessed.  
Him and Jill still had so much they needed to work through and this attack was   
like taking a giant step backwards. The guys and Ryker didn't understand just   
how much they meant to each other. How much Mike had feared losing her,   
especially after he had fought so hard to get her to return to him after he had   
found her again. They didn't understand how scared and vulnerable Jill was at   
times. They had never witnessed the sleepless nights and the nightmares. Mike   
wasn't sure he could go through that again. In the last few months, things had   
been getting better. He knew if he went to prison, Jill would not make it by   
herself. She had become too dependent on Mike taking care of her.  
  
Willie and Terry were watching TV that evening when their door bell rang. Terry   
opened the door and Mike walked in.  
  
"Mike, hi. How's Jill"  
  
"Good. That's why I'm here. She's coming home tomorrow. I was wondering if   
you guys could come over and help me clean up the apartment. I don't want her   
to see it the way it is now."  
  
"Sure. Let's go, Willie."  
  
Terry and Willie cleaned up the kitchen and the living room while Mike cleaned   
the bedroom. There was stuff knocked over and trampled from a combination of   
the attack and all the cops trampling through. Mike straightened up the   
furniture, then went to the closet and brought the vacuum cleaner out. He had   
just come back into the room when he saw something shiny by the bathroom   
doorway. He bent down and picked up Jill's gold bracelet. It had come   
unclasped in the attack. He was turning it over in his hands when Terry walked   
in.  
  
"Things are in good shape in there. You need a hand in here?"  
  
"No, I just need to vacuum."  
  
"What 'cha got there?"  
  
"Jill's bracelet. It must have come off in the fight. I'll give it back to her   
tomorrow."  
  
"It's not broken, is it?"  
  
"No, it just came unclasped. Did I ever tell you that I gave Jill this bracelet   
and her engagement ring our first Christmas together?"  
  
Terry nodded as he sat on the edge of Mike and Jill's bed. He was trying to   
read Mike's face, trying to understand the conflicting emotions that must have   
been going through his mind.  
  
"Mike, are you sorry you did it?"  
  
"I don't know. I know it's hard for you guys to understand how I feel about   
Jill."  
  
"She's your wife, Mike. You have an obligation to try to protect her in any way   
you can."  
  
"No, it goes deeper than that. It goes much deeper than that."  
  
"Look, Mike, I know there are things about Jill that we don't know. That we may   
never know. But, you have to open the door, at least a little and let us in."  
  
"I can't let you guys in. It took Jill a long time to tell me some of these   
things and I can't betray her trust by telling you guys the things she has told   
me. It took me a long time to gain that trust and I can't blow it now."  
  
"Hey Mike, about this morning. I'm sorry. I didn't want to be the one to have   
to take you in, but Ryker hunted me and Willie down. He just thought it would   
be easier if it was one of us taking you in."  
  
"Don't worry about it. You had to do what you had to do, just like I had to do   
what I had to do."  
  
"She'll bounce back, Mike. You both will."  
  
"I can't afford to lose her, Terry. Not after the last time."  
  
The next morning, the doctor found Jill a pair of wrap around sunglasses to wear   
before she went home.  
  
"I want you to wear these as often as possible for the next week or so. If the   
spots get worse or you start having problems seeing, come in immediately.   
You're good to go as soon as your husband shows up with your clothes."  
  
"Thanks."  
  
"Any questions?"  
  
"No. Wait! I do have one. When can I go back to work?"  
  
"Let's wait a week to see how your eyes are healing. Okay?"  
  
There was a knock on the door. Mike walked in carrying an overnight bag with   
Jill's change of clothes in it.  
  
"Hi. You get dressed and I'll go sign you out."  
  
Jill was quiet on the ride home. Her heart was pounding as Mike pulled the car   
into their parking space. He put his hand over hers as she reached over to open   
her car door. She looked at him with eyes that were too wide and too scared,   
even covered by the opaque glasses.  
  
"Sit tight. I'll get the door."  
  
Mike opened the car door and helped Jill from the car. She looked at the top of   
the stairs as Mike took her hand and squeezed it. She took a deep breath as   
Mike unlocked the front door and led her inside. She lifted the glasses up to   
her forehead and looked around.  
  
"The guys came over and helped me straighten the place up last night."  
  
"It looks great."  
  
Jill slowly made her way toward their bedroom. She stood in the doorway,   
willing her heartbeat to return to normal. She jumped when Mike put a hand on   
her waist.  
  
"It's okay. You're safe now. Hey, come back in the other room. I have   
something that belongs to you."  
  
"What?"  
  
Mike took her hand and led her back into the living room. He took her bracelet   
and put it back around her wrist. Jill looked at him with tears in her eyes.  
  
"I thought it was broken. I was scared to ask about it."  
  
"I found it last night when I was cleaning."  
  
Jill leaned forward and kissed him. "Thank you."  
  
"You're welcome. Are you hungry?"  
  
"No. I just want to hold onto you for about the next billion years."  
  
Jill wrapped her arms tightly around Mike's neck, fighting hard not to cry. She   
didn't want to admit to Mike how scared she was being back in the apartment   
again. Mike held her as tightly as he could. He could feel her trembling, but   
he didn't understand why she was so scared.  
  
"Hey, you're trembling like a leaf. Baby, it's going to be okay. I'm not going   
to let anything happen to you."  
  
Mike put his hands behind him and tried to disengage Jill's arms from around his   
neck, but she wasn't about to let go of him so easily. Mike knew that she had   
to be terrified. Jill had never been known to be clingy in the past. Mike had   
always been the one who did the touching. It had taken Jill months before she   
approached Mike, taking his hand or touching him. He again untangled her arms   
from his neck as the door bell rang. He gently kissed her on top of her head.  
  
"Let me go get the door."  
  
Mike opened the door and let Willie and Terry in. Jill quickly pulled her   
glasses down to her eyes. She didn't want them to see her eyes. They looked   
awful. Jill flinched away from Terry as he tried to hug her. Terry looked at   
Mike who just shook his head.  
  
"Hi, Miss Jill. Nice glasses. Hey, we won't stay long. We know you need to   
rest. Call us if you need anything. Okay?"  
  
Mike stepped outside with the two guys. "She's pretty shook up. I can't get   
her to believe she's safe."  
  
Terry patted him on the arm. "Give her some time, Mike."  
  
Jill got up and began walking around the apartment while Mike was outside with   
the guys. She went into the bedroom. There was no sign that anything had taken   
place. No broken plaster, nothing. She sat on the edge of their bed and hugged   
her arms to herself. She was sitting there rocking herself when Mike walked in.   
He walked over and sat on the bed beside her and took her into his arms, trying   
to stop her from rocking.  
  
"Baby, what's the matter?"  
  
Jill just clung to him tightly. Mike sighed. He didn't know if he liked this   
side of Jill. He was beginning to feel like he couldn't breathe. Jill pulled   
away from him with tears streaming down her face. He lifted her glasses and   
wiped her face.  
  
"Mike, I...I was so scared. I thought he was going to kill me or worse. I   
didn't know you had come in. I fought him as hard as I could. I did everything   
I couldn't do when I was with Cleve. Everything that you told me to do.   
Nothing worked!  
  
"Baby, I was scared, too. I didn't want to lose you. But, it's going to be   
okay now. He's dead and he's not going to hurt anybody ever again."  
  
He finally got her to eat and then after dinner, he sat on the sofa with her   
sitting beside him with her head on his shoulder. She finally seemed to relax a   
little. Mike sat there thinking as he listened to Jill's deep breathing as she   
fell asleep. He wanted to move her into their bedroom, but he didn't want to   
wake her up. He decided to wait until he knew she was sound asleep so his   
moving her wouldn't awaken her. Even in sleep, Jill made sure she kept one hand   
on Mike at all times, as if she was afraid he was going to disappear on her.   
Finally, after watching her for another 15 minutes, he lifted her up in his arms   
and carried her to bed. Jill never moved. He got undressed and got into bed   
beside her. Jill stirred in her sleep and then did something she never did.   
She nestled closer to Mike. He put an arm around her shoulder and drew her   
closer to him, holding her as tightly as he could. Holding her like that, he   
finally fell asleep.  
  
He was awakened sometime later by screams. Jill's screams. A sound Mike hadn't   
heard in months, but a sound that still continued to send shock waves through   
his spine. He woke up and reached for Jill, but her side of the bed was empty.   
He turned on the lamp. Jill was huddled in a corner, curled up in a tight ball,   
hitting at the air with her fists, as if she was fighting someone only she could   
see. Mike ran over and tried to gather her into his arms, but she fought him,   
as well.  
  
"Jill, it's me! Jill, it's Mike!"  
  
Mike finally broke through her hysteria just as the door bell rang. He looked   
at her before he got up to answer the door. Terry was standing there in his   
shorts and tee shirt. Mike ran a hand through his hair.  
  
"Terry, I'm sorry."  
  
"Is this what you were referring to?"  
  
"Yeah. Once upon a time, this was almost a nightly ritual. Look, I'm sorry she   
woke you up. Let me get back in there and see if I can get her back to sleep.   
I'll see you tomorrow."  
  
"Okay. Good night."  
  
Mike walked back into the bedroom, sighing. Jill was still huddled in the   
corner, but she was quiet now. Mike knelt down in front of her.  
  
"Mike, who did I wake up?"  
  
"Terry. Don't worry about it. Do you want to talk about it?"  
  
"He was in here. He was in here and he had his hands on my throat and he was   
choking me again. I tried to scream, but no words came out. At least, I   
thought no words were coming out. I'm sorry, Mike. I didn't mean to wake   
everybody up."  
  
"It's okay. Do you want some tea?"  
  
"Yeah, some tea would be nice."  
  
Mike went into the kitchen and made two cups of tea and took them back into the   
bedroom. He sat beside Jill on the bed and pulled her beside him as they both   
sipped their tea in silence.  
  
"Mike, your friend, the one who was supposed to come over? Did you ever seen   
him?"  
  
"Ernie? He called me later. He said he got tied up and couldn't make it after   
all."  
  
"When the guy came to the door, I asked him if he was Ernie. I realize now that   
that was a mistake, because then he knew I was expecting someone. Someone that   
I had never seen before."  
  
"It's okay. This wasn't your fault."  
  
After holding her for several minutes, Mike could hear her deep, even breathing   
and knew she had once again fallen asleep. He took her tea mug from her hand   
and placed it on the bedside table beside his own. He gently laid her down on   
her pillow and covered her with the quilt. He then just sat there, watching her   
sleep. Watching her sleep had always been one of Mike's favorite pastimes.   
Watching her, period, had always been his hobby. But, as much as he wanted to   
watch her, he also felt the need to talk to Terry and Willie. He went into the   
other room and dialed their number. Terry answered the phone.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Terry, it's me. I'll be over there in about 5 minutes."  
  
Mike wrote Jill a note and left it on his pillow in case she woke up while he   
was gone. He wasn't planning on being gone very long.  
  
Terry and Willie's door was unlocked, so Mike just walked in after ringing the   
door bell. Terry offered him a beer. Mike took the bottle and twisted the cap   
off. Willie spoke first.  
  
"Mike, what's going on?"  
  
"I wish I knew. I've seen Jill scared in the past, but never like this. I'm a   
very physical person. Jill isn't. I've always been the one putting my hands on   
her. It took Jill a long time before she would approach me and even so much as   
take my hand in her own. She was always afraid I was going to reject her. Now,   
she doesn't want to let go of me."  
  
"Mike, you saved her from being raped and probably murdered by that psycho.   
Then, you weren't able to be with her for hours after that. She's probably   
afraid of losing you."  
  
"Well, she had better face that possibility, because I could very well be going   
to prison."  
  
In the apartment next door, Jill was tossing and turning and crying out Mike's   
name. If Mike had been beside her, he would have woke her up before she woke up   
and started screaming.  
  
Mike was still talking to Willie and Terry when he heard it. The terrified   
shrieks coming from their apartment. Mike ran for the door with Willie and   
Terry on his heels.  
  
"Here we go again."  
  
Jill, still asleep, ran to the front door and was desperately trying to open it,   
but Mike had locked it when he left. When they got to the door, they could hear   
Jill frantically trying to open it, to escape. Mike's hands were shaking as he   
tried to put his key in the door. Terry finally took the keys from him. Willie   
was right behind him.  
  
"Terry, be careful. You don't want to hit Jill with the door when you open it."  
  
"It's okay, Willie. I won't hit her."  
  
When Terry opened the door, Jill ran out of it and into Mike's arms with so much   
force she almost knocked both of them over the railing. When Jill made contact   
with Mike, she jerked awake. She looked at Mike, then at Willie and Terry, then  
Down at her nightgown and bare feet. The guys saw for the first time the reason   
for the dark glasses she had been wearing that afternoon. The whites of her   
eyes were blood red.  
  
"Why are we outside?"  
  
Terry glanced at Mike, who felt like he was going to lose his mind. Terry had   
an idea, which might let everybody get at least one night of decent sleep.  
  
"Jill, would you and Mike like to sleep at our place tonight? You and Mike can  
have my room and I'll crash on the sofa. Would that make you feel safer?"  
  
Jill stood there for a minute before slowly nodding her head. Mike walked up to   
Terry, furious. He spoke in a whisper to him.  
  
"Oh, this is great, Webster! What is going to happen tomorrow night when we go   
through this again? Why don't we just move in with you and Willie!"  
  
"Come on, Mike. You're not being fair."  
  
Terry put fresh linens on his bed and Mike laid down with Jill beside him. She  
Finally fell asleep with her head pillowed on Mike's shoulder making sure she   
kept one hand on him at all times. Mike finally fell into a deep sleep. He was   
awakened the next morning by Terry tapping on the bedroom door. His arm was   
asleep where Jill was still sleeping on it. He gently moved her over and got   
up, rubbing his arm as he opened the door.  
  
"Mike, Ryker's on the phone."  
  
Mike walked into the kitchen and picked up the phone. "Hello?"  
  
"Danko, what are you doing sleeping at Webster's?"  
  
"It's a long story. It's just a one night thing. What's up?"  
  
"You need to come down and talk to IAD. It's just a formality."  
  
"How long will I be gone?"  
  
"I don't know, Danko. I don't know what they're planning on asking you. It'll   
probably be an hour or two, maybe longer."  
  
"Okay. Let me take a shower and I'll be down there in half an hour or so."  
  
Jill was watching Mike as he pulled his clothes on and headed back to the   
apartment. She followed him in.  
  
"Mike, where are you going?"  
  
"I have to go talk to IAD. I need to take a shower."  
  
Jill got dressed and went over and sat on the bed, waiting for Mike to get out   
of the shower. He sighed when he opened the bathroom door and saw Jill sitting   
on the edge of the bed, looking at him expectantly. He was beginning to feel   
claustrophobic. He walked over and got a shirt and slacks out of the closet.   
Jill slid over to him when he sat on the bed to dress. She began to gently kiss   
the back of his neck, something that never failed to get his attention. He   
tried to ignore her, but it was impossible. He turned toward her and pulled her   
into his arms and crushed his mouth down hard on hers. They were kissing and   
exploring each other when suddenly Mike pulled away from her, trying to control   
his ragged breathing.  
  
"Mike, what's wrong?"  
  
"I have to go."  
  
"Mike..."  
  
"I have to get dressed."  
  
"Can I ride down there with you?"  
  
"I can't do this!"  
  
"Do what? What are you talking about?"  
  
"Jill, I don't understand what you're so afraid of, but I'm beginning to feel   
like I can't breathe!"  
  
"Once upon a time, you would have welcomed having me around all the time."  
  
"Babe, I love having you around all the time, but...I don't know, you constantly   
have to be touching me."  
  
"What's wrong with that? You have to be touching me all the time. Is there   
suddenly a double standard where you can put your hands on me any time you want,   
but I'm not allowed to touch you?"  
  
"I do not want to have this discussion now! I have to go talk to IAD! We can   
talk when I get back. Are you going to be here when I get back?"  
  
"I'm not going to bolt and run, if that's what you're talking about."  
  
"I'll be back in a couple of hours."  
  
Mike got dressed and headed out the door. Jill cringed as she heard the door   
slam shut behind him. He didn't understand how much being back in this   
apartment, being back in this bedroom terrified her. Jill couldn't even begin   
to explain it to him. In the past, making love had always made her feel closer   
to Mike. It had always been a source of comfort and safety. Today had been the   
first time since they had been intimate that Mike had refused her. It was rare   
that Jill initiated the contact and in the past, Mike had always been overjoyed   
when Jill approached him wanting to make love. She didn't understand what was   
going on. She knew there was no way she was going to be able to stay in this   
apartment until she could make Mike understand how scared she was and she was   
beginning to see how difficult her task was going to be.  
  
Mike walked into the meeting with Internal Affairs. He was already feeling   
ragged from lack of sleep. He wasn't sure he was ready for a meeting with IAD.  
  
"I'M Capt. Fuller, Officer Danko. We've been reviewing your statements and the   
statements of your wife and Officers Webster and Gillis. Pending the outcome of   
the Grand Jury, effective tomorrow, we're going to reinstate you back on duty.   
But, you will be on desk duty."  
  
"So, in other words, I'm still guilty until proven innocent."  
  
"No, Officer Danko. That is policy. You do understand policy, don't you?"  
  
"Yes, sir. I understand policy."  
  
"Then, I guess we'll see you tomorrow morning, Officer Danko."  
  
Jill was surprised when Mike walked into the apartment barely an hour after he   
had left. He walked over to the kitchen and got out the bottle of scotch. Jill   
knew he was not happy, but she thought he was still angry at her. She sat and   
watched him with wide eyes. Finally, she had to speak. The silence was   
deafening.  
  
"What did IAD say?"  
  
"What did they say? Let me see, what did they say?" Oh, yeah, now I remember.   
I get to go back on duty tomorrow."  
  
"Mike, that's great!"  
  
"Wait! I haven't gotten to the good part, yet. I get to go back on duty, but   
I'm relegated to desk duty. Hell, I might as well stay home!"  
  
"What are you going to do if you do stay home? Sit around and feel sorry for   
yourself?"  
  
"If I choose."  
  
"Mike, are you angry at me or angry at yourself for losing control?"  
  
"I'm not angry at you, Jill."  
  
"Well, you sure have a funny way of showing it!"  
  
"Are you talking about this morning? Jill, I had a meeting! I would have loved nothing better than to stay in bed this morning and make love to you."  
  
"You know, if I didn't know you better, I might buy that excuse. About the meeting. I remember times in Alabama when you had meetings with your C.O. and you managed to find time to stay in bed for an extra 20 minutes or so. I know there are times when Roll Call is at 7 o'clock and you barely make it. Times when I'm supposed to be at work and I barely make it. Don't tell me that you couldn't make love to me because you had a meeting! If you couldn't make love to me, then just say so! I can understand that, given the pressure you've been under lately."  
  
"What do you know about the pressure I've been under?"  
  
"Mike, I know you killed a man in our bedroom with your bare hands. That's got to be something awful to have to work through in your mind."  
  
"Speaking of me killing a man in our bedroom, is that why you won't sleep in there?"  
  
"Mike, I can't. I keep seeing his face, the rage in it when I started calling for you. I called for you and called for you, but you didn't come."  
  
"Baby, I'm sorry." I got home as soon as I could. You have to believe me when I tell you that you're safe, that you're not going to get hurt again."  
  
"You don't know that! What if you go to jail? Who is going to take care of me then?"  
  
"I don't even want to talk about that now."  
  
"We're going to have to talk about it eventually."  
  
"No, we don't. Not right now."  
  
"Then, when? When they find you guilty and sentence you? Are we going to talk about it then, Mike?"  
  
"I thought you had more faith in me than that!"  
  
"I do, Mike, but I'm scared."  
  
"And you think I'm not? This is my life that's on the line here!"  
  
"That's where you're wrong! It's our life! Yours and mine! Since the day I met you, it's always been our life!"  
  
"Speaking of our life, where are we going to sleep tonight?"  
  
"I don't know."  
  
"I'll tell you what. What if I pull out the sofa sleeper and we sleep in here?"  
  
"It doesn't matter. I won't sleep, anyway."  
  
Mike poured another glass of scotch. He didn't know what to say to Jill to make her feel better. He didn't know what she wanted from him. He felt drained, emotions he rarely felt with Jill. He had always given himself wholeheartedly to Jill in the past. He had helped her deal with what he referred to as her demons, things that continued to haunt her. There were countless nights she had woke him up with her nightmares and her wanderings. He didn't know why he felt so angry and distant from her this time. Like all he wanted was for her to leave him alone. To give him some breathing room.  
  
"Mike..."  
  
"Jill, I don't want to talk about this, anymore. Just let it go, okay?"  
  
"Mike, why are you shutting me out? That's always been my department."  
  
"Oh, so I guess I'm not allowed to keep anything from you. I have to be open and honest with you at all times. Is that it?"  
  
"Are you throwing what Cleve did to me up in my face? The fact that I didn't want to tell you about what he had done to me until you forced it out of me! How dare you!"  
  
"Jill, for once, this doesn't have anything to do with what Cleve did to you. This is just about you and me."  
  
Jill's eyes blazed angrily into his. "Is it really, Mike?" Things have never been just about you and me since you came into the bowling alley that day. Things have been about the police department and your friends, but they haven't been just about you and me."  
  
"This argument has been building for months. What do you want from me, Jill? Blood? I didn't want to leave you, but I had to go to Vietnam. I didn't know you were going to take off like you did."  
  
"You should have known I would. I told you it was my style to wander."  
  
"I didn't think you meant halfway across the country. Is that why you're so angry? Because I left you?"  
  
"I'm not the one who's angry. I'm just trying to understand why you're treating me like this."  
  
"Why am I treating you like this? Because you're beginning to make me feel like I can't breathe! I can't take two steps without you being right behind me! Right now, I have other things on my mind besides taking care of you."  
  
"Well, if I'm making you feel like you can't breathe, maybe I should leave. Then, you'll have all the breathing room you need."  
  
"I don't want you to leave. I just want you to give me some room. Please? Just until I can sort things out."  
  
"Sure, Mike. I'll give you as much room as you need."  
  
After that, Jill turned as cold as ice. She was worse than she was the night Mike had met her and she had been pretty cold then. Though she was acting cold on the outside, on the inside her heart was splintered into a million pieces. She loved Mike so much. She couldn't deal with his pain as well as his callous treatment of her. She tried to think of somewhere she could go, just to think until this was resolved. Staying with Terry and Willie was out. It would make an already bad situation worse. She decided that for now, she would get a hotel room. She decided to wait until the next day when Mike was gone. She wasn't up to another argument and she didn't want Mike begging her to stay when she knew deep down that he didn't mean it. That night, Mike pulled out the sofa sleeper and they lay down in bed, laying as far apart as two people could possibly lay in the same bed. Neither of them slept the entire night and they didn't speak at all the next morning as Mike ate his breakfast and headed for work with Willie and Terry.  
  
After they left, Jill went into the other room and took her suitcase out of the closet and filled it with some of her things. Then, she sat down and wrote probably the hardest note she had ever had to write in her life. Tears flowed freely as she wrote:  
  
Mike,  
First off, I want you to know that I love you very much. But, I can't live like this. I'm sorry if I'm making you feel like you can't breathe. But, if I stay here, I'm not going to be able to breathe, either. I don't know where I'm going to go. All I do know is I can't stay here. I'll call you in a few days about picking up the rest of my things. I love you.  
Jill  
  
To be continued...  
  
  
  
  



	2. Part 2

DISCLAIMER: The characters are the property of Viacom, Spelling/Goldberg Productions and the writers of the show. I am not making any money off of this story. I just like to take the characters out once in a while and play with them for a while.  
  
TITLE: To Protect And To Love (Part 2)  
  
Rating: PG13 for violence and sexual situations.  
  
Setting: Early first season, after the pilot.  
  
Summary: Officer Danko kills an intruder who has attacked his wife Jill in their home. Can he get out of this mess before he loses everything he's worked so hard for?  
  
Author's notes: I realize there are some aspects of this story that require an explanation. Explanations will follow in a future Rookies story.  
  
Part 2:  
  
Jill put on her dark sunglasses and drove first to Memorial Hospital, where she worked as a registered nurse. She went to talk to her nursing supervisor about taking a leave of absence until she could figure out where she was going with this situation with Mike. After her supervisor granted the leave, she drove to the Seventeenth Precinct, where Mike was a cop. She wasn't looking for Mike, but for Lt. Ryker. Sgt Older, the officer who handled Ryker's phone calls and dispatches, went and found him for her. Jill was sitting outside Lt. Ryker's office when he walked in.  
  
"Mrs. Danko? Please come in."  
  
"Thank you for seeing me. I'm sorry I didn't call."  
  
"That's okay. Come in. Would you like some coffee?"  
  
"No. I can only stay a minute. Can you do me a favor and give Mike something for me?"  
  
"Mike's upstairs on a desk, Mrs. Danko. You can go up...  
  
"No. I can't do that. Something's happened. He won't talk to me. He's angry and he's pushing me away. I can't get through to him."  
  
"What happened to you and to Mike is an awful thing. A police officer doesn't like to have to kill, despite reports to the contrary. Mike is having to see the department psychiatrist as part of his condition to returning to duty. If you give him time, he'll start talking to you.  
  
"I can't wait that long. I've never seen him so cold. It's like he's dead."  
  
"What are you going to do?"  
  
"I'm leaving."  
  
"Where are you going to do? And, how long are you going to keep running?"  
  
"I don't know where I'm going to go. And, as for how long I plan on running, I don't know that, either."  
  
Jill was fighting tears as she took her set of apartment keys out of her purse. She laid them on Ryker's desk. She then picked up her wrist and unclasped the gold bracelet she always wore. The bracelet that had always meant more to her than either of her rings, because it was the first gift Mike had ever given her.  
  
"Give Mike my keys and the bracelet. Will you do that for me?  
  
"If you need a place to stay..."  
  
"Oh no! Staying with you would be almost as bad or worse than staying with Terry and Willie."  
  
"You didn't let me finish. I have a house near the beach in Malibu. I don't live there. Don't ask me why, it's a long story and I don't have time to go into it here. Just let me say I haven't lived there in some time. I have a caretaker who takes care of the place and I have a few horses. To me, there is something about the beach that I think is good for the soul. It's a good place to sit and just think."  
  
"Are you going to tell Mike where I am? I mean, if I do decide to go out there?"  
  
"Yes. But, you can see him or not, that's up to you. I'll let Trap know you're on your way."  
  
Ryker wrote directions down on a sheet of paper. Jill almost thought she heard him wrong when he had said the last part. He'd let Trap know? There was only one person Jill knew who had the name Trap, but it couldn't be. The world was too big, wasn't it. A mixture of fear and trepidation raced through Jill. She had memories of her past. A past that included a house in Beverly Hills, Cleve and a childhood friend named Trap. A man who had saved her after she had almost died. The reason she had met Mike.  
  
"Did you say Trap?"  
  
"Yeah, he's my caretaker. He's been working for me for about 5 or 6 months. You know him?"  
  
"Yeah, I think so. His name is T.R. Applegate."  
  
"Yeah, that's his name."  
  
"Can you ask him to please leave me alone when I go out there?"  
  
"I can do that."  
  
"Thank you, Lieutenant."  
  
Ryker watched as Jill walked out the door before he picked up the phone. He tried the phone in the barn, first, because Trap would hear it if was out in the yard. It was picked up on the second ring.  
  
"Applegate!"  
  
"This is Lt. Ryker. I want you to listen carefully and don't ask any questions."  
  
Trap looked at the phone in his hand. Since starting work for the mysterious police lieutenant that spring, Trap had only seen him a handful of times. Ryker had hired Trap after telling him that he would never come out to the large white and rock house near the beach. If he had business with him, they could meet in town. The situation suited Trap just fine. He didn't like a boss who was always hovering around, anyway. Ryker paid him fairly well, although Trap didn't understand how on a cop's salary. All Ryker asked of Trap in return was to stay away from the large house on the property. There was another, smaller house which is where Trap stayed. Trap was happy and he did a good job, which made Ryker happy.  
  
"Yes, sir. I'm listening."  
  
"You know a young lady named Jill? I don't know what her last name was when you knew her, but do you know her?"  
  
Suddenly, thoughts of eyes that were always too large and too scared loomed into the picture in Trap's mind. Trap hadn't thought of Jill since spring when she had told him that she was going to go back to Mike and try to put the pieces of her shattered marriage back together. He had wished her well after telling her not to come running back to him when Mike hurt her again, because he knew Mike would.  
  
"Danko. Yeah, I know Jill."  
  
"So, you've known her recently?"  
  
"I've known Jill since I was a child."  
  
"Okay, again, no questions. She's on her way out there to stay in the big house. I don't know how long she'll be there, but she did tell me to tell you that she wants to be left alone. You do understand left alone, don't you, Applegate?"  
  
"With Jill, I know that expression all too well, sir."  
  
"If the cleaning service has been there, then there shouldn't be anything to worry about."  
  
"The house was cleaned yesterday."  
  
"Good. I am going to tell her husband where she is. I told her it's up to her whether she sees him or not."  
  
"What did Mike do to her this time?"  
  
"That's not any of your business, Applegate. Your business is to take care of my property. That is the only thing I pay you for."  
  
"Yes, sir. Is there anything else, sir?"  
  
"No. I just wanted to let you know Mrs. Danko is coming out there, so her arrival doesn't hit you like a ton of bricks."  
  
"Thank you, sir. I think."  
  
Mike was talking to Terry and Willie at his desk when Ryker walked into the room.  
  
"Danko, I need to talk to you in my office, now! Gillis, Webster, don't you have somewhere you're supposed to be?"  
  
"Yes, sir. Right away, sir. Come on, Willie."  
  
Mike followed Ryker into his office wondering just what he had done now.  
  
"Close the door."  
  
"Yes, sir. Is there something wrong, sir?"  
  
"I don't know, Danko. Why don't you tell me?"  
  
"Sir?"  
  
Ryker handed Mike the manila envelope containing Jill's things. Mike looked at him, puzzled, as he opened it and poured the contents out in his hand.  
  
"Your wife was here earlier. She dropped those things off and told me to give them to you. You're tearing her up inside, Danko. She told me to give those to you. Whatever it is, Danko, that's going on inside your head, you had better start to try to work through, because if you don't, the most important thing in your life is going to slip right through your fingers."  
  
"Lieutenant, I can't do this. I can't deal with the ramifications of what I did to Temple and having to deal with what Jill's going through, also. It's taking every bit of energy I have to just stay alive and breathe, it seems like. We had an argument and I told her I needed some breathing room. I didn't think she was going to up and leave. Did she say where she was going?"  
  
"No, but I do know where I sent her."  
  
Ryker wrote directions on another sheet of paper and handed it to Mike, who looked at him with a puzzled expression.  
  
"This is the address and directions to my home in Malibu. I have to tell you something, though. You know my caretaker or at least he knows you and I don't think you're too popular with him for some reason."  
  
"Who's your caretaker?"  
  
"His name is T. R. Applegate."  
  
"Trap? Yeah, you're right. I'm not his favorite person, but he's not mine, either. He's known Jill since he was a kid. He was there for her at one of the darkest moments of her life. He likes to let me know that it was him who rescued her first and not me. He makes sure I know this at every oppurtunity. Does Jill know you were going to tell me where she was going?"  
  
"I told her I was, but I also told her that it was up to her whether she decided to see you or not. If I were you, Danko, I'd give her some time. Not a lot of time, mind you, but a couple of days, anyway."  
  
"Well, time is one luxury I may not have, Lieutenant."  
  
"You're thinking like a loser, Danko."  
  
"Yeah, well, I feel like one right now, sir."  
  
Jill drove along the curving road, trying to think. She had committed the directions to memory and had no trouble finding the road she was supposed to turn off of. About half a mile down the road, she found the double gates and pulled up to them. She rolled down her window and pressed the buzzer. A couple of minutes later, the gates slowly opened and Jill drove through. The whole thing reminded her of the house in Beverly Hills where she had lived with Cleve and Trap, in what seemed like another lifetime. The whole area had security gates like this house. She wondered what the reason was for the secrecy and why Ryker didn't live here. There was a small house as she drove up the drive and a man was standing out in front of it. Jill recognized the dark wavy hair immediately. She stopped the car and came face to face with her past.  
  
"Hello, Trap."  
  
"Hello, Jill."  
  
Trap looked at Jill carefully. He was tall, about 6'2, with dark, wavy hair and deep set dark brown eyes. He had known Jill as long as he could remember. He had always assumed they would marry someday, until fate and Cleve Andrews had intervened. Trap didn't understand the reason for her dark glasses, but he did see the bruises on her face. He was wondering if Mike had beaten her. Because, if he had, Trap was going to rip him apart. Mike had told him once that he would never, ever hurt Jill.  
  
"I was told to give you the keys to the big house."  
  
"The Big House? Why does that sound like something from 'Gone With The Wind' or a really bad prison movie? I thought I was going to be staying here."  
  
"No, not here. Here are the keys. The house is just around the curve. Ryker has some rooms that are locked. I don't know why, but he is insistent that they are to stay locked."  
  
"What does he think I'm going to do, snoop around? I'm a wanderer, not a snoop."  
  
"Can we talk later?"  
  
"About what?"  
  
"About why you're here. About what happened between you and Mike."  
  
"Speaking of Mike, he's probably going to show up here later. Trap, I'm not ready to see him, yet. Can you stop him?"  
  
"Yeah, I can stop him. And, I will stop him, if you agree to talk to me later."  
  
"Okay, we can talk later."  
  
"Then, Mike won't see you."  
  
Jill got back in the car and drove around the curving driveway until she reached the house. She stopped and looked up in awe. The house was a huge, 3 story house, built of rock. There was a pool around the side of the house. Jill got out of the car and walked up and unlocked the door. She stepped into the entryway and looked up at the curving staircase. The front room had a grand piano and a huge rock fireplace. Jill slowly walked up the stairs to the bedrooms and tried to find a place to put her suitcase. The first two rooms were locked, but the third one opened when she turned the door knob. The room she entered had a king sized brass four poster bed in the middle and was decorated in bright yellow and white. Like the downstairs, the room had a huge rock fireplace in it. Jill loved the room. To her, it looked like sunshine. She laid her suitcase on the bed and walked over to the window. She had a perfect view of the mountains in the distance and the stable down below. She missed Mike, but she didn't miss the way he had been treating her, so she figured exploring this huge place might be just the thing to do for a while.  
  
She walked back downstairs to the kitchen. There weren't any groceries, but Jill figured she could go to town and pick some things up. She didn't know how long she was going to be here. She wasn't ready for Mike to come crawling back on his knees and beg for forgiveness. She walked over to the basement door and tried it. It was locked, too, but this didn't bother Jill. She didn't like basements. She never had.  
  
After he got off duty, Mike drove to the apartment. That was where he found the note from Jill. Terry and Willie rang the door bell and walked in. Mike was standing in the middle of the living room reading and re-reading the note.  
  
"Mike? What's going on? Where's Jill?"  
  
"She left, Terry."  
  
"Left? Where did she go?"  
  
Mike handed him the note and went to get some beers out of the refrigerator. He handed one to each of the guys.  
  
"She's staying out at Ryker's, but she doesn't want to see me. At least, not yet."  
  
"Mike, what is going on? This note doesn't make any sense."  
  
"After we came back from your apartment yesterday morning, things got a little tense."  
  
"Mike, I'm sorry if I made you angry about the other night, but I didn't know what else to do. We all needed some sleep and I knew you weren't going to get any if Jill kept waking up screaming every hour. So, how did things get tense?"  
  
"Jill was in the bedroom when I came out of the shower. She came over to me as I was trying to get dressed for my meeting with IAD. She started kissing me and touching me and I...I had to push her away."  
  
"Mike, why did you push her away?"  
  
"Because, I couldn't do anything, Willie! Is that blunt enough for you guys?"  
  
Terry took a drink of his beer before speaking. "Mike, that's not such a big deal. I think all of us men go through that at one time or another."  
  
"No, Terry. It's more than that. I love Jill more than anything in this world, but she's beginning to make me feel like I can't breathe."  
  
"And, you told her that?"  
  
"Yeah, we got into an argument last night and the words just flew out of my mouth before I could stop them."  
  
"So, what are you going to do?"  
  
"I don't know, Terry. Right now, I need all of my energy just to fight these charges against me."  
  
"Mike, it could take months to get this resolved. Are you going to sit here and tell us that you're going to leave her at Ryker's for that long? My God, she'll drive him nuts!"  
  
"No, she won't. I get the feeling talking to him that he doesn't stay at this place. But, Trap does."  
  
Willie looked at Mike. "What's a Trap?"  
  
"Trap's not a 'what.' He's a 'who.' He's an old friend of Jill's. He's the one who brought her out here while I was still in Vietnam. Him and I have some issues."  
  
"He's in love with Jill?"  
  
"Yeah, Terry, but I think it's like it is with you guys. He feels more protective of her than anything else. He thinks I'm going to hurt her."  
  
"He should know that you would never hurt her."  
  
"But, I have hurt her, Terry. If I hadn't hurt her, she wouldn't have left."  
  
"Mike, you didn't hurt her intentionally. You would never do that. Willie and I have watched you with her. We have watched how much the two of you love each other. You guys could give lessons. Don't let her slip away from you."  
  
Mike rubbed at his eyes. He was not going to break down and cry, not in front of his two best friends. He knew Terry was right. He loved Jill and he needed her by his side. But, he also knew how stubborn and head strong she could be. How stubborn they could both be when they felt backed up against a wall. After a little while, the guys left and Mike sat down on the sofa to think. He knew he had to give her a little bit of time, but he knew he couldn't give her much, otherwise he wasn't so sure she would come back this time. It had almost taken an act of congress to get her to come back to him after that day at the bowling alley. Since then, the past 5 months had been a series of ups and downs, mostly ups. Like Terry had said, they were both so crazy about each other that a lot of the bad stuff tended to get either ignored or swept under the rug. And, he knew a lot of stuff went unsaid during their argument the previous night. Stuff that Mike knew was going to have to be said. The air needed to be cleared. He decided to drive out to Malibu the next day and see if Jill would see him. Meanwhile, he got in his car and decided to drive. Somehow, he ended up at his parent's home. He knew as he walked up to the front door and let himself in that his father was not going to be overly sympathetic to the fact that Jill had left him.  
  
His father was reading the newspaper when Mike walked in. The silence hung heavy in the air as Mike took a seat on the sofa.  
  
"Michael, what brings you around? Your mother and I haven't seen much of you since you graduated from the academy. How's police work?"  
  
"Police work is fine, sir."  
  
"It seems that half of you is missing. Where's Jill this evening? Work?"  
  
"No, sir. I wanted to call you and mother and tell you about this, but...there was an attack in our apartment a few nights ago."  
  
"I know. Lt. Ryker called me and told me."  
  
"He called you? Why didn't you call?"  
  
"I figured you would call us if you needed us. Since you didn't call, we figured you didn't need us."  
  
"If I needed you? Pop, they're going to try to put me away! If that's not needing you guys, then I don't know what is! Is this about Jill again? I know you don't like her, but she could have been killed the other night."  
  
"So, where is she?"  
  
"We had an argument. She walked out."  
  
"It's not easy being married to a cop. Maybe it's for the best. She never seemed to have the temperament for it, anyway,"  
  
Mike stood up and walked toward the door. "Number one, stop calling my wife 'She.' Number two, I told you once that if you have declared war on my wife, then you have declared war on me."  
  
With those parting words, Mike walked out the door, slamming it behind him.  
  
It took Jill a long time to go to sleep that night. And, with her sleep, came the dreams. She dreamed of the night Mike had taken her back to the apartment after Officer Shaw's retirement party. After they had talked, he had led her back the his bedroom, slowly removed her clothing and his own and had made love to her for hours. The dream was so real that Jill woke up crying out Mike's name. She sat up, not remembering at first where she was. She resisted the urge to pick up the phone and calling Mike. She wanted him to come out here and hold her and tell her he was sorry. To make love to her like he had that night. Like he had for the past 5 months. She lay back down and cried herself to sleep.  
  
The next afternoon, Trap was brushing down the horses when he heard the gate buzzer. He walked over and hit the control button to open the gates. He was standing there when a white car drove up and stopped. Mike opened the car door and got up. He walked up to the corral where Trap was continuing to brush the horse.  
  
"You're late, Mike. I expected you yesterday."  
  
"I wanted to give Jill some time alone. Where is she?"  
  
"She doesn't want to see you. She told me yesterday to keep you away from her."  
  
"Charming. So, like I said, where is she? Is she staying here with you like the old days?"  
  
"No, she isn't staying here, Mike. Mike, what happened that night between me and Jill was a mistake..."  
  
"No kidding, especially considering the fact that Jill is my wife and not yours!"  
  
"She didn't know where you were, Mike! God, she was 21 years old and scared to death! And, if you want to know, making love with her that night made me feel like shit! You and I weren't friends, but I still felt like I was betraying you! I don't know why you two haven't talked about any of the stuff that happened that year you were gone. You think that just because you got her to come back to you that everything was going to be peachy, business as usual. There were nights when I thought she was going to try to kill herself again. How could you have done what you did to her? How can you live with yourself?"  
  
"I'm not going to get into this with you. I told you that when I called you asking where Jill was. Look, if you see Jill, let her know I was here and I will be back in a few days."  
  
"I have one question, Mike. How did Jill get the bruises?"  
  
"You think I beat her, don't you?"  
  
"I don't know. That's why I'm asking. Because, if you did beat her, after everything she went through with Cleve, I'll personally rip you apart."  
  
"Trap, I didn't beat her. I would never do that to her. I think I told you that once. I have to go. Give Jill my message."  
  
Trap watched Mike drive off before walking up to the big house to see Jill. He had to know just what was going on. He found her sitting in a patio chair by the pool. He sat in the chair opposite her. She lifted up her dark glasses to look at him.  
  
"I had a visitor a few minutes ago."  
  
"Mike?"  
  
"Yeah. He just left. He told me to tell you that he was here and he'll check back in a few days. You want to tell me about the bruises? I asked Mike about them. I asked him if he had beaten you. He told me no. So, if Mike didn't do it, how did you get them."  
  
"A man came to our door several days ago. Mike had told me the night before that he might be expecting an old Army buddy of his. So, when I opened the door on the chain, I asked this man if he was the friend Mike was expecting. He wasn't, but he told me he was. I didn't know, because I didn't know what this person looked like. Mike didn't tell me. The guy broke through the door and tried to kill me. Mike came home and caught him on top of me trying to strangle me. Mike ended up killing the guy."  
  
"He shot him?"  
  
  
Jill shook her head. "I don't know any of the details. I think Mike beat him to death. He won't talk to me about it. When he took me home from the hospital, I was scared to stay in the apartment. It started creating problems. He told me I was making him feel like he couldn't breathe. That's why I left."  
  
"Are you going to be okay?"  
  
"What? You mean my eyes?"  
  
"Yeah, well, your eyes and everything else."  
  
"My eyes will take a few weeks."  
  
Jill buried her face in her hands and began to cry. Trap came over and gathered her into his arms. He wasn't Mike, but at least he was a shoulder to cry on.  
  
"It's going to be okay, Jill."  
  
"I don't care so much about myself, Trap. I love Mike so much! I want him back in my life, but not if he doesn't want me to be there."  
  
"He loves you, Jill. He was upset when I told him you didn't want to see him. He asked me if you were staying with in the little house with me. Like old times, he said. I told him that what happened that night between you and me was a mistake. Jill, why did you have to tell him about that?"  
  
"I had to, Trap. I didn't want any more secrets between us. There had already been too many."  
  
"You know you guys have a lot of stuff to talk about."  
  
"I know. When I went back to him in the spring, it was like nothing had happened. I know now that there's a lot of stuff that both of us chose to ignore."  
  
For the next several days, things kind of went on as they had been. Then, one day, Jill needed to pick up some things from the apartment when she remembered that she didn't have her keys. She had given them back to Mike. She called the apartment, but Mike wasn't there, so she dialed Terry and Willie's number. Willie answered the phone.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Willie, it's me. Jill."  
  
"Jill, hi. Hey, Mike isn't here."  
  
"I know. I tried calling the apartment. Hey, I don't have my keys and I need to pick up some things. I was wondering if I could come by and get the spare key from you guys so I could get into the apartment."  
  
"Yeah, sure. When are you going to come by?"  
  
"I should be there in about an hour."  
  
"Okay. Come by and one of us will let you in."  
  
"Thanks, Willie."  
  
Willie hung up and looked at Terry, who had just come into the room.  
  
"Terry, do you think we should call Mike?"  
  
"No. We don't want to scare her off. I wish he would drive back out there and try to see her again. Get this mess straightened out."  
  
"What good would it do? She won't see him."  
  
Jill came by and picked up the keys from Willie. She was picking some things up when the door bell rang. Terry walked in as Jill was going through hers' and Mike's record collection.  
  
"Hi. Willie said you had come to get the key. Have you talked to Mike?"  
  
"Is that why you're here? To see if I've talked to him, so you can report back to him?"  
  
"You know we'll tell him. Jill, how long is this going to go on?"  
  
"Why don't you ask Mike? He's the one who needed 'breathing' room."  
  
Terry watched as she continued to leaf through their records. Mike had told him at one time that every song on every one of those records meant something to both of them.  
  
"So, are you going to take Van Morrison or The Turtles? Mike misses you so much, Jill. It's not like the missing you he was doing before we found out he was married. This is different. Back then, he was doing what he thought he had to do. Now, he wants you back, but he doesn't know how to go about it."  
  
"That day, when he told you he was married, how did he act?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Did he act like someone in love or was it just something he mentioned in passing?"  
  
"I'm not sure. He said that you lived here in town and he wanted to see you and get to know you again. He was very definite about that."  
  
"That day he walked into the bowling alley, I almost told him to get lost. Sometimes, I wish I had."  
  
"Hey, if you had told him to get lost, you wouldn't have met us."  
  
Normally, a statement like that would have made Jill smile. Today, she just looked sad and lost. Terry felt incredibly sorry for her. He knew being away from Mike was not something she wanted. But, it wasn't up to her to make the first move. It had to be up to Mike. She pulled one of her albums out and was looking at it.  
  
"Terry, have they heard anything else about the investigation?"  
  
"No, Mike said they should have the M.E's report any day now. Then, I guess it'll go from there."  
  
"Before I met Mike, I thought I was Miss Self-Reliant. Then I met Mike and he took care of me almost from day one. When Mike went to Vietnam the last time, I had to learn to take care of myself again, only I didn't do a great job of it. I had problems with panic attacks. By the time Mike got back, I had pretty much gotten past the attacks. I had resigned myself to the fact that for whatever reason I wasn't going to see Mike ever again. He didn't write to me at all while he was over seas. I didn't know what to think. Anyway, one day he shows up at the bowling alley where I was working in a police uniform. Terry, I didn't like cops. I didn't trust them. I didn't trust anybody. He asked me to go to that party. I didn't intend on coming back here and spending the night with him. But, I missed him, Terry. I missed him taking care of me and always telling me he loved me. And, not minding me hanging out with his friends."  
  
"Then, you have to do what you can to remedy this situation. I know Mike and I know how stubborn he can be, but right now, you're being just as stubborn as he is."  
  
"I have to go."  
  
"Jill, you can't run forever."  
  
She kissed him on the cheek as she walked to the door. "I know. Bye, Terry."  
  
"Bye, Jill."  
  
Jill ran down to her car. She didn't want Terry to see her crying. It was now early fall and she hadn't been with Mike in weeks. The weather at the beach was cool. Jill would go for long walks and she would go horseback riding, but she missed doing these things with Mike. She was beginning to feel like a part of her had died. She didn't know that things were about to reach a dramatic, joyful conclusion.  
  
Mike was working at his desk when his phone rang.  
  
"Danko!"  
  
"Officer Danko, this is Capt. Fuller from IAD. Can you come up here right away, please?"  
  
"Yes, sir. I'll be there in 5 minutes."  
  
Mike felt like the other shoe was about to drop as he knocked on the door to IAD. When he was asked to come in, Capt. Fuller and Lt. Ryker were sitting at the long rectangular table with several people Mike didn't know.  
  
"Officer Danko, please sit down. This is Dr. Woodrow from the Medical Examiner's Office and Mr. Hays from the District Attorney's Office."  
  
"Do I need a lawyer?"  
  
The Medical Examiner spoke up. "Relax, Officer Danko. I have just gotten the report back on the official cause of death of Reese Temple. It seems Mr. Temple had a aortic aneurysm which means there was a blood vessel that had ballooned and was leaking blood. It had probably been that way for a long time due to the amount of blood that was found in the pericardium during the autopsy. He had not bruises to his chest."  
  
"I don't understand. What are you saying?"  
  
"He had bruises on his head and face, the result of your attack on him. These injuries were not fatal. There were no bruises to his chest, meaning you didn't cause his death. I have talked to Mr. Hays here and he concurs with my findings."  
  
"I'm not going to be charged?"  
  
"No, Officer Danko, you're not going to be charged. I seriously doubt you would have been charged, anyway. I think any man would have done the same thing if he had been in your shoes. As soon as the lieutenant here finishes his report, you can return to regular duty."  
  
"Thank you!"  
  
Mike felt like shouting from the rooftops. Willie and Terry were in the break room when Mike walked in.  
  
"It's over!"  
  
Willie almost choked on his sandwich. "What's over?"  
  
"Temple didn't die as a result of the beating. It was an aneurysm!"  
  
Terry looked at Mike with cold brown eyes. "Don't you think you're sharing this with the wrong people?"  
  
"Yeah, you're right! Let me see if Ryker will let me go talk to Jill! I'll see you guys later!"  
  
Mike got permission from Ryker to take off. Terry was right. There was only one person he really wanted to share this news with and that was his beautiful lady, Jill. Terry had told him she had come to the apartment and how she had been very down and very sad. Mike glanced up at the sky as he headed for his car. Storm clouds were brewing. He knew if he was going to get to Ryker's, he had better get there fast before the storm broke. Jill had an intense, overwhelming fear of thunderstorms.  
  
It had been a particularly melancholy day for Jill. She was missing Mike badly today as she rode down to the beach on the chestnut mare she had borrowed from the stable. She got off the mare's back and walked along the beach watching the sky. She walked for a while down the beach with her shoes in her hand. She finally sat down by some rocks and propped her chin up on her knees, trying not to cry. She felt like that was all she had been doing since that day at the apartment was crying. She missed Mike so terribly. She hadn't missed him this badly when he had left her to go to Vietnam that last time. She had been having awful dreams along with the dream about him making love to her. She didn't know which dreams were worse. Her eyes were almost healed now, they were just red and puffy from her constant flow of tears. She wiped at them furiously. She hated losing control by crying. She always had.  
  
Trap was mending a fence when the gate buzzer sounded. He walked over and hit the control button and sighed as the white car drove up.  
  
"Hi, Trap. Is Jill at the big house?"  
  
"No, she went riding on the beach. I guess today's a bad day."  
  
"How so?"  
  
"I don't know. She just seemed very down, that's all. You might be able to get through to her this time. Even if she just needs you for comfort, I guess you're better than nothing. I've heard screams coming from the house late at night."  
  
"Jill's been having nightmares? Why didn't you call me?"  
  
"Because, deep down, I don't want her to be with you, but I guess if I stand in your way, I'm going to get trampled."  
  
"Damn right! Which way did she go?'  
  
"Go up to the big house and park your car. There's a gate to the right of the house. It leads up to the part of the beach Jill always goes to."  
  
Jill didn't know how long she sat there sobbing. She didn't see how it was possible to miss somebody so much and not die.  
  
Mike was walking down the beach when he spotted the horse, who whinnied a greeting. Jill looked up when she heard the horse. She again wiped at her streaming eyes as she saw Mike walking down the beach, but she didn't move as he slowly approached her. Finally, he was standing directly in front of her. Jill had to shade her eyes to see him from her sitting position on the sand.  
  
Mike felt like crying himself when he saw her face. He hated to see her cry, hated it when she was sad, especially when all of this was his fault.  
  
"How did you find me?"  
  
"Trap told me you were out here. He said it didn't appear to be a good day. I came to make it better."  
  
"How are you going to do that, Mike?"  
  
"They dropped the charges against me. They found out Temple didn't die as a result of the beating."  
  
"Is that all you came to tell me?"  
  
Mike's voice was thick with emotion. "No. I came to tell you how sorry I am. I didn't mean to hurt you. I would never hurt you. I want you to come back home with me."  
  
"Just like that? Snap your fingers and you think I'm going to come back to you? Mike, we have a lot of stuff to talk about."  
  
"I know that."  
  
"And, I know you would never intentionally hurt me, but the fact still remains that you did hurt me, Mike. You hurt me very badly. I know you had a lot of things you were trying to work out, but so did I. We can't keep shutting each other out. That was a major problem in Alabama and it's starting to become a major problem here, too. We need a line of communications between us, Mike, or it's never going to work."  
  
"Okay, fair enough. Why don't we start by you telling me why you are so afraid to stay in the apartment even after I assured you that it was safe."  
  
"I keep seeing his face, Mike. I know he's dead, but I don't know how he died. All I know is you did it. You did it to save me and it scares me to know that I could have lost you that day."  
  
"I don't know exactly what I did. I know I punched him several times. Willie and Terry came in and pulled me off of him. It just scared me to see what he was doing to you, but it also scared me when I realized I had enough rage in me to kill another person like that. To think I could have lost you and everything I ever worked for in a moment of pure rage."  
  
"What are you saying, Mike? That you're sorry you did it? If you hadn't, I might be dead now and you probably would be, too. Because I'm sure after he got done with me, he would have started in on you, too. I'm glad you did it. I was afraid I was going to die without ever seeing you again. And, to me, that would have been worse than anything he ever could have done to me."  
  
Mike's voice began choking up. "Jill, baby, please come home with me? Please? I love you so much. I'm not complete without you."  
  
Jill continued looking up at Mike, who was still standing. She could see the tears in his blue-green eyes. She loved it when he called her 'baby.' Just the way he said it never failed to send shivers up her spine. He slowly held his hand out to her, just as he had that first day she had gone out with him. The day in the bleachers. The day Jill realized that her whole future was wrapped up in this man. The day she knew she was never going to love another man as much as she loved him. She put her hand in his and he slowly helped her to her feet. She stood in front of him for what seemed an eternity as her dark brown eyes met his paler blue green ones. He slowly brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes as he bent down to kiss her ever so gently and then with considerably more passion. Jill slowly broke the kiss and looked at him with tears running down her face. Mike reached out and wiped them away with a gentle hand.  
  
"Baby, why are you crying?"  
  
"I could ask you the same question. I love you so much, Mike. I never want to be apart from you like this again. I never want to stop loving you."  
  
She threw her arms around his neck and held onto him as tears once again flowed down her face. Mike had always teased her in the past when she cried like this, saying they would need to build an ark. But, today he didn't say anything. He just held her and let her cry, because he was also crying.  
  
Jill breathed in the scent of the cologne he always wore, the smell of which had been invading her dreams. He always smelled so wonderful. He finally pulled her away from him to kiss her again. Gently, at first, then more insistently. Jill moaned softly as Mike's hands began a slow exploration under her shirt. It finally took all of Jill's control to pull away from him. She leaned into him, breathlessly.  
  
"You've never made love on a beach before, have you?  
  
"No."  
  
"Believe me, you don't want to. It's not near as romantic as it looks in the movies. Sand goes everywhere. Besides, I think it's going to storm soon."  
  
"I don't think I can get you back to the apartment. I don't have that much self control."  
  
"You should see the room where I've been sleeping. It has a brass bed and a fireplace."  
  
"A fireplace, huh? I don't think things can get much more romantic than that. Do we have wine?"  
  
"Yeah, I think Lt. Ryker has a few bottles on a rack in the kitchen."  
  
"Then, I suggest we get your ride over there and head off down to the house. Otherwise, sand or not, we're not going to go anywhere."  
  
Jill picked up her shoes and took Mike's hand tightly in hers' as they headed back to where the horse was still standing. Mike helped her onto the horses' broad back before he climbed up behind her. Jill thought she had never felt anything as wonderful in her life as Mike's strong arms around her as they rode toward the stable. Mike was impatient as he waited for Jill to take care of the horse, rubbing her down and giving her some oats.  
  
When they got to the house, Jill showed Mike the room where she had been sleeping. He pulled her into his arms and began kissing her again as thunder rumbled outside the open window. When Jill once again pulled away from him, her eyes were shining brightly. She put her hand on his lips and he kissed her fingertips.  
  
"I'm going to go take a shower."  
  
Mike looked disappointed as she said this.  
  
"I have to get rid of this sand and sea salt. While I'm gone, why don't you start a fire in here and get a bottle of wine from the kitchen."  
  
"Do you need someone to wash your back?"  
  
"No. I want the first time we make love again to be in that brass bed and not in the shower, although we can always save that for later."  
  
"Just don't be done too long, because it's going to storm soon and I'm going to miss you too much."  
  
"Okay."  
  
Jill stood in the shower for a long time letting the water pelt down on her. She felt like crying she was so happy. Mike was back and he still loved her. Even after the long separation, he still loved her. That was all Jill ever wanted. She finally turned off the shower, stepped out and began to dry off. She slipped her long white gown over her head and brushed her long dark hair. She took a deep breath before opening the bathroom door and going back to the room she was now sharing with Mike. She didn't know why she was so nervous. It wasn't like she hadn't ever done this before. Mike was laying on one side of the bed with his head propped up on his hand when Jill walked in. He felt like he could never tire of looking at her, watching her.  
  
The room was brightly lit up by the fire in the fireplace. Mike had also found some candles and had set them around the room. Jill smiled as she stretched out on the bed beside Mike and he handed her a glass of wine. She began to blush at the look in his eyes. He reached over and took her glass from her hand and set it on the night stand beside his own. Then he pulled her closer to him and began to kiss her once again. He slowly pushed the puffed sleeve of her nightgown over her shoulder and began to kiss her neck and shoulder. Jill closed her eyes and gasped as Mike began to kiss and nibble his way further down her body. Jill reached for Mike's shirt and began to unbutton it with slow, shaking fingers.  
  
"You have me at a disadvantage, sir."  
  
"How do you mean?"  
  
"You're wearing more than I am at the moment. I'm afraid I'm going to have to remedy that situation."  
  
"You need some help?"  
  
"No, I'll take your clothes off with my teeth if I have to."  
  
Mike began laughing as he once again pulled Jill closer to him. "Yeah, I bet you would. But, I can help you out."  
  
Mike took her still trembling fingers in his hands and kissed them gently. Then, he pulled his shirt from his pants and took it off. Jill wasn't sure when the rest of their clothes melted off, but it seemed that they all of a sudden ended up in a pile by the bed. Their lovemaking was slow, at least at first, but it wasn't long before they both got caught up in the heat of the moment.  
  
Mike slowed down his pace. Jill opened her eyes and looked up at him, wondering what was wrong. She smiled at the look on his face. She thought she had never in her life seen as much love as she saw in Mike's eyes at that moment. She pulled him down closer to her and began to kiss him. Her mind raced back to the first night they had ever made love, the night another storm had been raging outside. The night she had told him that she had some problems with sex.  
  
Mike pulled her closer to him, waiting for his breathing and heartrate to return to normal. He looked down at Jill, wondering what she was smiling so mysteriously about. He kissed her with slow lingering kisses all over her face.  
  
"What are you laying here smiling about?"  
  
"I was just thinking."  
  
"About what?"  
  
"The first time we made love. The night I told you I had a problem with sex. Do you remember?"  
  
"Yeah and I told you that you knew what went where and why. Milady, I don't think you have a problem, anymore."  
  
"No, I don't think I have a problem, anymore. That must be what they mean when they talk about mind blowing sex."  
  
Well, it was always pretty mind blowing, but now it goes beyond that."  
  
He leaned down on one elbow to look down at Jill's face. "I think that was mind blowing, awe inspiring, spiritual, incredible...  
  
"Are you going to run out of words anytime soon, Danko?"  
  
"Not in this lifetime."  
  
Jill reached down to touch him. "You recover quickly. And, to think Willie and Terry think you're old."  
  
"I'm not that old, milady. Besides, I have a lot of lost time to make up for."  
  
The second time they made love, time seemed to slow down. It seemed hours before either of them came up for air. Mike looked down at Jill's sleepy eyes and kissed her again before rolling over to one side and pulling her close to him.  
  
"Are you sleepy?"  
  
"Um hmmm."  
  
"Then, go to sleep."  
  
"You'll be here when I wake up?"  
  
"Only for the rest of my life."  
  
"I love you, Mike."  
  
"I love you too, baby."  
  
Jill woke up sometime later. It was still dark, but the moon was shining through the open window. The curtains were gently blowing in the night time breeze. Jill sat up and found her discarded gown by the side of the bed and slipped it back over her head. She didn't know why she had woke up, but now she couldn't go back to sleep. She looked over at Mike, peacefully sleeping beside her. She got up and walked to the window and sat there looking at the moon. She smiled when she felt Mike leaning his chin on her knee.  
  
"Nightmare?"  
  
"I don't know. I just woke up. Mike, can we go home tomorrow?"  
  
"What? And give up this romantic setting?"  
  
"The only romantic setting I want is in our apartment with you."  
  
"Hey, I have something that belongs to you. This is the second time I've had to give this back to you. If I have to do it a third time, I'm going to staple it to your wrist."  
  
Jill smiled as Mike put her bracelet back around her wrist and clasped it. She put her arms around his neck as he stood up and picked her up into his arms. She giggled as he began to kiss her again on the neck.  
  
"Are you ever going to get enough?"  
  
"Are you complaining?"  
  
"Not me. I promised you earlier we could use the shower."  
  
"Tomorrow. Right now, I don't think we're going to make it that far."  
  
"The self control issue again?"  
  
"You've got it."  
  
"Mike, have I told you lately how crazy I am about you?"  
  
"Not in about an hour."  
  
"I love you so much, Mike."  
  
"I love you so much, too, baby."  
  
THE END  



End file.
